Wednesday, August 8, 2012

(not so) Great Olympic Moments



New post on Fellowship of the Minds

(not so) Great Olympic Moments

by Terry

Dumbest Olympic Sports Of All Time

The Olympics! They are grand, they are filled with pomp, but Jeeze are some of the events stupid. I have long maintained, for example, that the primary difference between water polo and ice hockey is temperature. But when it comes to dumb Olympic events, water polo doesn't even begin to splash the surface.
Now they have badminton (smirk) which even the Asian teams are trying to lose. Not even those players want THAT medal!
(Did you know that from 1912 til the Mid 20th century, POETRY READING was a medal winning event?)
Check out these moronic sports which, thankfully, have been retired from the games.

#5. 200-Meter Swimming Race (1900)

Swimming underwater is one of those things that is impressive to do, but maybe not so much to watch. And if you think you're bored in front of the TV, imagine how the live spectators feel while staring at the surface of a pool.

#4. 14 lb. Stone Throw (1908)

Yeah, this one seems a little underwhelming. If only the Olympians were to figure out a way to kill two birds with it, then they might have been on to something.

#3. Dueling Pistol (Participants Shot At Dummies Dressed In Frock Coats, 1906)

Yeah, nothing says global harmony like rewarding the athlete who's best at shooting people in the belly.
They should have used 'live' opponents: Winner Take All. You would only need to buy 1 medal!

#2. 56 lb. Weight Throw (1904-1920)

Forget those girly-man 14 lb. rock throwers. THIS was where the REAL men competed!
I know what you're thinking. Why wasn't it a 57 lb. weight throw? Because that would be stupid!

#1.Running Deer Shooting, Single Shot (1908-1924)

How did they hand out medals for this? Was the podium just three dudes standing there with medals
slung over one shoulder and dead deer over the other? What a mess.
I have a GREAT idea for a new event!
Sure it's kool to watch the javelin throwers toss that spear, and I'm sure it came in handy for catching dinner back in the day.
BUT...if you wanted to see an event that required the UTMOST in timing, co-ordination and daring, this would be the ULTIMATE:

CATCHING the javelin in your MOUTH!

Now even I would pay to see that!

Terry | August 6, 2012 at 4:40 am | Tags: Humor, Olympics | Categories: 2012 Olympics, Humor, Uncategorized | URL: http://wp.me/pKuKY-gha

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