Monday, February 20, 2012

Re: Troy Roness: It's Time: Yes, I'm Gay, and I'm Unapologetic

Gay Activists, who are focused on making
Americans accept their lifestyle
---
just like the religious

we just don't want you marching up and down the
streets, parading around in boas, assless chaps and/or leather thongs
in
front of our children, announcing that you have now found yourself
----
if they break the law they should be charged.
if they're making you uncomfortable ...

On Feb 20, 8:01 am, Keith In Tampa <keithinta...@gmail.com> wrote:
> LilTommyTomTomForNews quoted Troy Roness:
>
> *"It's not internalized heterosexism when I say that my sexuality doesn't
> define me any more than my eating disorder does. As a culture, we need to
> move beyond limiting beliefs and one-dimensional labels that take away from
> the amazing individuals we actually are."
> *
> *====*
>
> **
> Uhm......Tommy?  Troy?   Society has moved past "one dimensional labels,
> and characterizing folks by whom they choose to hop in the sack with.
> Come to think of it;  society has never characterized folks with one
> dimensional labels, only  militant Gay Activists, who are focused on making
> Americans accept their lifestyle, seem to be focused on such labels.
>
> The truth be known,  we really don't care who it is that you choose to play
> "Hide The Salami"  with;  we just don't want you marching up and down the
> streets, parading around in boas, assless chaps and/or leather thongs in
> front of our children,  announcing that you have now found yourself,  (or
> found your genitalia). NO ONE CARES WHO YOU ARE BUMPIN' UGLIES WITH!  Keep
> it to yourselves,  and quit sharing your sexual escapades with us!
>
> Sincerely,
>
> America
> *
> *
> On Sun, Feb 19, 2012 at 2:22 PM, THE ANNOINTED ONE <markmka...@gmail.com>wrote:
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> > Just another person with problems...why is this on a Political
> > Forum???
>
> > > Growing up in North Dakota in an environment abundant with oceans of
> > > wheat, vast plains, rolling hills, and wonderful people, it's hard to
> > > believe that such a tumultuous journey could lie ahead in a young
> > > man's life.
> > > To each outcast, in every sense possible, this piece is for you.
>
> > > In a quiet community of roughly 1,000 residents, I lived a fairly
> > > "normal" existence. Worshiping in my hometown church, participating in
> > > community events, and riding my bike everywhere until dusk was part of
> > > everyday life. But dark clouds gathered in the distance of my sky, and
> > > I had no idea a "perfect storm" would soon begin my Stepford-like
> > > existence.
>
> > > For the first 16 years of my life, I was exposed to emotional trauma
> > > at home and bullying and teasing in school, and I became very good at
> > > trying to make everyone happy. I wore many hats when tackling my
> > > ever-changing surroundings. My mother always instilled in me that
> > > there was nothing I couldn't do. I was always encouraged. Sure, my
> > > parents pushed for solid academics, but like all parents, they wanted
> > > me to succeed. I embraced being respectful to everyone I was
> > > surrounded by and used humor to attract attention in an attempt to
> > > separate myself from my insecurities.
>
> > > I played every sport possible and was even named "Senior Athlete of
> > > the Year." However, this "jock" was nervous, hated his looks, and was
> > > forced into internal seclusion despite his outward demeanor. I never
> > > realized I was struggling. Everything I was feeling, good, bad, or
> > > otherwise, was simply pushed down and nearly unnoticeable.
>
> > > Fortunately, I was introduced to faith, true faith, during my teen
> > > years and embraced all it had to offer. The Lord took my heart at the
> > > age of 18 and never let it go. I'll never blame my faith for obstacles
> > > I've endured. In fact, it's what keeps me going through the most
> > > difficult of times.
>
> > > Staring at myself in a mirror, I internalized my shame, guilt, and
> > > insecurities. I believed my appearance defined my existence. The
> > > perfect grades, the perfect body, and appearing flawless would somehow
> > > make me complete. I've learned, though, that we aren't mean to be
> > > "perfect"; we're meant to be whole.
>
> > > College is everyone's opportunity to be free, thrive on their own, and
> > > separate from their roots, right? Well, with no idea of where life
> > > would take me, I spiraled into an addiction to exercise, paired with
> > > anorexia -- aka "eating disorder not otherwise specified," or EDNOS.
>
> > > Yes. I'm a guy with an eating disorder, a jock, a Christian... and
> > > gay. One of the major contributors to my illness was the internal
> > > fight where faith was my guide and being gay was incredibly wrong.
> > > However, I could never simply throw it away and believe that's why
> > > I've struggled for so long.
>
> > > In an appearance on Dr. Phil in 2009, I sought help and endured six
> > > months of residential treatment to begin my recovery. I addressed
> > > emotional trauma, my parents' divorce, perfectionism, self-hate,
> > > bullying, and family alcoholism. However, throughout that time, and
> > > even the year after, I never addressed the internalized homophobia
> > > that manifested out of my desire to please God. Contrary to popular
> > > belief, eating disorders aren't about looking good. Through extreme
> > > exercise and trying to control what I could, the physical, I nearly
> > > killed myself, twice, by pushing my body to the brink, enduring
> > > self-punishment and starvation.
>
> > > I've drawn my own conclusions about the responses I'll receive
> > > concerning my sexuality: avoidance, hatred, acknowledgment, and pity.
> > > Just FYI, I'll take any of those responses but pity. It's taken so
> > > long to be where I am and to find my voice, so I'll never regret the
> > > journey here.
>
> > > Telling a few loved ones that I'm gay has been interesting, but most
> > > people who know me are learning this for the first time as they read
> > > this piece. Aug. 31, 2010 was a first step. On that day I received the
> > > craziest response: acceptance. That's the response I'd feared. Odd,
> > > right? Even more terrifying, though, was that that person had
> > > "wondered" about my sexuality for some time.
>
> > > Damn it.
>
> > > I thought, "Had all my personal hell and pain in silence been for
> > > nothing?" I mean, my entire belief system wanted rejection and
> > > ostracism; it's what I deserved for being "wrong." After all, I fought
> > > for 22 years by myself and tried two years of traditional and
> > > Christian counseling to change. If the Lord didn't love me, who would?
>
> > > You see, I knew I was "different" by age 5. In that small community, I
> > > remember leaving the yard against my mother's instructions, stopping
> > > next to a fire hydrant about a block from home, looking up at the sky,
> > > talking to God, and asking Him for a boyfriend. I look back with two
> > > contrasting views: first, what an incredibly pure and even "cute"
> > > third-person memory of a boy praying to God innocently, but second,
> > > this may have been the beginning of the shame I've always carried.
>
> > > On my knees I cried and prayed for God to take it away, to take me
> > > away. I even prayed for a sign that would tell me that this was what
> > > I'd have to carry by age 16. Needless to say, that age came and went.
>
> > > The movie Prayers for Bobby really hit home. Because of my incredible
> > > faith and hope for acceptance, I imagined the mother and son as a
> > > single unit, fighting for what was "right." Growing up with direct and
> > > indirect messages that you're part of the moral decline of society is
> > > rough. I'll never forget being told that God hates me or that I should
> > > be isolated on an island.
>
> > > Self-hatred is nothing but a disease. Even if a small amount thrives
> > > within, life doesn't have to throw much our way to bring down all the
> > > good for which we've worked so hard.
>
> > > My biggest challenge now lies in societal assumptions. I'm not a label
> > > or stereotype, and I refuse to be generalized. I'm still that
> > > respectful young man from home, not because I'm gay, but because I'm
> > > me. I don't emulate many of the caricatures of LGBT individuals in the
> > > media. And, yes, I'm still Christian. It's not internalized
> > > heterosexism when I say that my sexuality doesn't define me any more
> > > than my eating disorder does. As a culture, we need to move beyond
> > > limiting beliefs and one-dimensional labels that take away from the
> > > amazing individuals we actually are.
>
> > > In my fight to end eating disorders, I've spoken to thousands through
> > > advocacy with the National Eating Disorders Association, NORMAL in
> > > Schools, Inc., the National Association of Males with Eating
> > > Disorders, MentorConnect, PBS' This Emotional Life, and those working
> > > legislatively to ensure a healthy environment for all. But before
> > > today, I never mentioned my sexuality. I've always thought that
> > > people, specifically men, have enough stigma when it comes to eating
> > > disorders. From being told it's a "woman's-only issue" to being called
> > > "weak," stigma prevents too many from seeking the help they deserve.
> > > Why feed into the erroneous belief that everyone with an eating
> > > disorder is gay? Not all people who have eating disorders are gay;
> > > that fact should be pointed out. However, a large portion of the LGBT
> > > community is plagued by this illness, stemming from non-acceptance,
> > > self-hate, and feelings of unworthiness that must be addressed before
> > > one more person is lost. I won't participate in the social structure
> > > that denies anyone's opportunity to survive.
>
> > > To those individuals in my past who've thrown at me the words "p*ssy,"
> > > "f*ggot," or anything of the like, yes, I remember your names, faces,
> > > and words, but I have to ask, "Are you happy now?" You may have been
> > > correct in your assumptions concerning my sexuality, but you were very
> > > wrong in estimating my resilience in recovery and my perseverance to
> > > eventually stand on my own.
>
> > > I've had many mentors during the course of my life, and I pray that I
> > > don't lose their respect. I'm the same individual I was 10 seconds
> > > before they clicked this link. That said, if they turn away, it will
> > > be my turn to take their place and become another's ally.
>
> > > I now embrace everything that's come to pass. I'm here for a reason. A
> > > heart attack and organ failure resulting from an eating disorder,
> > > partly fueled by internalized homophobia, nearly killed me, twice.
> > > Being alive is
>
> ...
>
> read more »

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