<Grin>!
Call me slow, but I don't recall either one of these and they are clasics!! Thanks for sharing these PlainOl! (I suck at telling jokes, but I will try and remember these!)!!
Good to see ya by the way!
On Thu, Apr 7, 2011 at 10:58 PM, plainolamerican <plainolamerican@gmail.com> wrote:
For three years, the young Democrat took his vacations at a country
inn. He had an affair with the innkeeper's daughter. Looking forward
to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the
inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her
lap!
"Why didn't you write when you learned you were pregnant?" he cried.
"I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the
child would have my name!"
"Well," she said, "when my folks found out about my condition, we sat
up all night talkin' and talkin' and we finally decided it would be
better to have a bastard in the family than an Democrat."
> <plainolameri...@gmail.com>wrote:
On Apr 7, 3:52 pm, Travis <baconl...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Plaino: I originally heard this as an Eichmann joke.
>
> On Thu, Apr 7, 2011 at 3:36 PM, plainolamerican
> > For options & help seehttp://groups.google.com/group/PoliticalForum>
>
>
> > The old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called
> > his lawyer.
> > "I want to become a Democrat. Get me a change of registration form."
> > "You can do it", the lawyer said, "But why? You'll be dead soon, why
> > do you want to become a Democrat?"
> > "That's my business! Get me the form!" Four days later, the old man
> > got his registration changed. His lawyer was at his bedside making
> > sure his bill would be paid. Suddenly the old man was racked with fits
> > of coughing, and it was clear that this would be the end. Still
> > curious, the lawyer leaned over and said,
> > "Please, before it's too late, tell me why you wanted to become a
> > Democrat so badly before you died?" In a faint whisper, as he breathed
> > his last, the old man said:
> > "One less Democrat."
>
> > On Apr 7, 1:49 pm, Travis <baconl...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > > The Looking Spoon Blog <http://www.thelookingspoon.com/blog.html>
> > > <http://fusion.google.com/add?source=atgs&feedurl=http://feeds.feedbur..
> > .>
> > > ------------------------------
>
> > > Practical Jokes for
> > > Liberals<
> >http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/thelookingspoon/Gprc/~3/-QwpGW4KhPs/22...>
>
> > > Posted: 01 Apr 2011 01:44 PM PDT
>
> > > April Fools Day seems like a good day for this list...they're not all
> > > "practical" jokes, some of these are just ways to mess with them.
> > > ----------
>
> > > Every April 1st send a birthday card to the Democratic Party.
>
> > > Tell some really hunky member of PETA that he's a beefcake (you might
> > have
> > > better luck hunting unicorn).
>
> > > Accuse a liberal of plagiarizing Biden every time they burp.
>
> > > Go the the Sierra Club office/treehouse and hang a sign outside the
> > bathroom
> > > reminding the tree huggers of the Golden Rule, therefore toilet paper is
> > > hereby banned from use.
>
> > > Attend a speech given by Rahm Emanuel, make that beeping censor noise
> > every
> > > time he talks, except when he drops an F-bomb.
>
> > > Convince people to register Democrat by promising membership involves
> > lots
> > > of conveniently unspecific screwing.
>
> > > Send PETA a cease and desist order from People for the Ethical Treatment
> > of
> > > Real Ocean Life (PETROL) informing them the pens their offices use use
> > ink
> > > extracted from squid.
>
> > > Get the Koch brothers to sponsor a mailing of autographed pictures of
> > Scott
> > > Walker to all Democrats, yes, all of them.
>
> > > Petition the U.N. to make April 1st Global Warming Day.
>
> > > Get 10 friends together to watch MSNBC at the same time to create a
> > > mysterious ratings spike.
>
> > > Barge into a Planned Parenthood with a crying baby in your arms and
> > demand
> > > your money back.
>
> > > Go to any Democratic headquarters and announce that you are a registered
> > > Republican and your tired of the way President Obama has been treated and
> > > you're ready to show your support for him by re-registering to Kenyan.
>
> > > Potentially start a Pakistani Muslim-esque riot by placing a personal ad
> > on
> > > Craigslist in San Francisco titled "Looking For Love in all the Wrong
> > > Places" under the name G. Bush.
>
> > > Distribute "special" brownies at demonstrations to legalize pot...neglect
> > to
> > > mention they're special because they're made with Ex-lax.
>
> > > Go into an uber-hipster coffee shop and throw a fit when they wont give
> > you
> > > an off menu item, like coffee.
>
> > > Ask every long haired hippie man you see for their autograph and that you
> > > love them on The View.
>
> > > Photoshop years out of Nancy Pelosi's Wikipedia photo to make her look
> > 70.
>
> > > Brag to your liberal friends that you've decided to be friendlier to the
> > > environment by taking your bike everywhere you go, and then prove it by
> > > showing them how you keep it in the trunk of your car.
>
> > > Do the magic trick where you pull a coin out of a Democrat's ear, but
> > > instead of a coin use a mini plastic brain.
>
> > > Make them breathe a sigh of relief by telling them Helen Thomas is now
> > > registered Republican.
>
> > > Get liberals to sign a petition forcing a Jeopardy showdown between the
> > > super-computer WATSON and TOTUS.
>
> > > Barge into Planned Parenthood with a wire hanger and brag about how they
> > > taught you everything you know about choice.
>
> > > Program the auto correct feature on their word processor to change words
> > > like "revolution" and "fair share" and "progressive," or anything else
> > that
> > > sounds like liberal whining into "I <3 Reagan."
>
> > > Change the nationality of every Democrat bio on Wikipedia to "Hell."
>
> > > Make national news by starting a CNN fan club.
>
> > > Biden's Idea For Energy
> > > Independence<
> >http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/thelookingspoon/Gprc/~3/yzakar4PM2A/22...>
>
> > > Posted: 01 Apr 2011 09:30 AM PDT
>
> > > Check out my collection of Biden "toons" (including this one) in the top
> > > navigation links at "Biden the April
> > > Fool<http://www.thelookingspoon.com/biden-the-april-fool.html>
> > > ."
>
> > > You are subscribed to email updates from
> > > Blog<http://www.thelookingspoon.com/blog.html>
> > > To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe
> > > now<
> >http://feedburner.google.com/fb/a/mailunsubscribe?k=sPXVFa54PAdcEz_Hi...>
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> > IL
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>
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